Facebook love and war - Cincinnati News, FOX19-WXIX TV

Facebook love and war

By Sheila Gray – bio | email

(FOX19) - Facebook is known as a social network, and for good reason. It connects people, sometimes with positive outcomes, and other times, not so much.

A new study by the dating website match.com surveyed 11,000 people, and it found one in six couples who got married last year connected online.

Hope and Christopher Flowers of Florence got married last month.

"They as kids I remember they would flirt a little bit," said Christopher's sister, Summer.

Hope and Christopher were in the same youth group at church when they were 14.

"We went on a date when we were 14 to the mall and she kinda ditched me," said Christopher.

Like lots of childhood friends, they lost touch, but reconnected 10 years later on Facebook.

Hope and Christopher are a great example of what happens when people re-connect on Facebook. But there's also a sad, perhaps dishonest side.

Some people who find love again on the social network are married to other people.

The firm Divorce Online in Britain says Facebook is cited in 20 percent of the divorce petitions in handles.

"I could not believe the words that came out of my own husbands mouth. It was disgusting, vulgar," said a woman named Sue.

Sue's life started to unravel last year, when she found out her husband was cheating.

She found out when she simply turned on her home computer and found him logged onto his Facebook account.

"Went to his inbox and there were messages from a female talking about how she missed him and how she couldn't wait until she saw him again details about where they had met things they had done," she said.

He also talked about his marital problems with Sue with an old love from high school.

"I've had several clients now who've gone through the termination of a marriage because a spouse found someone on Facebook, who've they've reconnected to and either live with or are marrying that other individual," said Ross Evans, a Cincinnati Domestic Relations attorney.

Evans has handled hundreds of divorces. He says Facebook isn't to blame for the breakup of marriages, but it does make cheating a lot easier.

A man named Tyler says his ex-wife was meeting up with old flames on Facebook.

"I think there are a lot of things that people are a lot more comfortable saying via text/email that they would probably never say in person or via phone," he writes. "It's much easier to drop hints or flirt with someone online than in person. I found out later that he was sending her direct emails not visible on your public page about leaving me and starting back where they left off, I'm not right for her, he can treat her better, etc."

Evans says spouses should allow each other access to their Facebook pages and communicate, and really hear the other spouse's needs.

He says a warning sign for trouble is one spouse spending too much time on the Internet, especially late into the night.

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