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Hot Reads: Midseason nominees for the Chinstrap Awards

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(RNN) - It's the midway point of the season, which means two things - first, we're that much deeper into the death march for the BCS system.

We know you're excited, but save your happy dance for February.

Second, it's time to update the nominees for the most prestigious awards in college football - the Chinstrap Awards.

Some familiar names are on the list. Some, you may not recognize.

No matter what, we can all agree on this - if there is any conference that deserves its own major awards program, it's our beloved NFL Lite.

Best Drama

Frontrunner: Steve Spurrier and Jadeveon Clowney - The coach loves his star player, and later he's angry at him. The coach all but questions the star player's manhood, and three days later he says that player did more for his school than sliced bread did for sacked lunches.

You kind of want to see this end, but then you remember how much Luke and Laura did for ratings.

Other nominees:

Georgia in the fourth quarter - Not even the entire fourth quarter, just the last five minutes or so. Their games have turned into NASCAR races.

Texas A&M - The circus in College Station is suffering a clown shortage, but there's still a lot of season left.

Best comedic performance

Frontrunner: Bo Wallace pumping his receivers - Yeah well, that turned out exactly as planned. It's not that Ole Miss's receivers can't score at will against Alabama, they just decided not to that particular day. Bo's hair really is awesome, by the way, even better than some of the women who interview him.

Other nominees:

Steve Spurrier and Jadeveon Clowney - Their public interaction is as ridiculous as it is sad.

Les Miles - Who so brilliantly reminded us of the difference between holidays honoring Italian people and holidays honoring Irish people. Speaking of hair, he should stick with his natural color. You're a handsome man, Coach Miles. Embrace and enjoy it.

Tennessee's offense vs. Oregon - And Florida, for that matter. How did they post 31 on Georgia? Oh right, because the Bulldogs sometimes forget the rules of flag football don't apply.

Jockstrap Award

Frontrunner: Dak Prescott, Mississippi State - At this point in time, Prescott is the reserve player who is doing the most to support his team. Who saw that coming before the season started? And an even more important question - why has he not yet officially been named the starter?

Other nominees:

Brendan Douglas/J.J. Green, Georgia - The best running back tandem in the conference - maybe the country - is hurt, one of them for the season. These two may tote a lot of mail from here on out.

Cameron Artis-Payne/Corey Grant, Auburn - There seems to be a theme with running backs in this category. Tre Mason is the starter, but these guys are just as vital. More on them later.

Maty Mauk, Missouri - You're up, big boy. You got a loaded team, a smart coach and a potential mentor in an arm sling dropping knowledge in your ear. Make the best of this.

Bottom-of-the-Pile Award

Frontrunner: Jadeveon Clowney - Here is an exact quote from the preseason Chinny Awards nominations: "With all the hype, anything short of 30 sacks and unearthing Jimmy Hoffa would be somewhat disappointing."

He likely won't total 30 sacks for his career, let alone the season, and Hoffa still sleeps with the fishes.

Other nominees:

Tyler Russell, Mississippi State - He's a good college quarterback, but he'll continue to wear a headset as long as Prescott is making explosive plays.

Secondaries - Georgia, Missouri, Texas A&M, Auburn - even LSU and Alabama at certain points. Take your pick of which group of defensive backs to trust least.

Bo Wallace, Ole Miss - He was handed the keys to one of the fanciest new cars in the country before the season. Hopefully, he doesn't crash it into a wall.

No "I" in Team Award

Frontrunner: South Carolina - Without question, the most balanced team in the SEC East Division. Most people thought last year's team was the most talented in the history of the program, but this squad is a quiet killer.

Other nominees:

Alabama - They're less than dominant and still undefeated. Coaches believe in respecting every opponent, so we'll respectfully say even the games other than LSU and Auburn could be tough for the Tide.

Florida - Starting quarterback goes down. Star defensive tackle goes down. Gators just keep on trucking.

Auburn - In case you haven't noticed, there's a little something going on in Lee County, AL.

Unknown-to-Unstoppable Award

Frontrunner: Mike Davis, South Carolina - He's making Marcus Lattimore more of a distant memory every time he touches the ball.

Other nominees:

Alex Collins, Arkansas - Obviously, Bret Bielema subscribes to the Steve Spurrier theory of running your star freshman tailback until his legs fall apart. Even if it doesn't produce wins, the records are worth it.

Dak Prescott, Mississippi State - It looks like he's about as much fun to tackle as a pickup truck. He's about as big, too.

Michael Sam, Missouri - He is leading a beastly front seven. Through six games, Sam has more sacks (six) than he had in two previous seasons (five), and he's tied for the SEC lead.

Cool Customer Award

Frontrunner: Gary Pinkel, Missouri - If he keeps his currently 6-0 team from turning into a five-alarm house fire with James Franklin out for the season, he is the slam-dunk winner of this award at the end of the season.

Other nominees:

Les Miles, LSU - He's loosey goosey no matter what the situation - the anti-Saban, if you will.

Will Muschamp, Florida - Why are we not talking more about what an awesome coach he is?

Hugh Freeze - In August, we thought consecutive games against Texas, Alabama, Auburn, LSU and Texas A&M were the buzzsaw. Now those last two games against Mizzou and Mississippi State don't look so promising.

Gamebreaker Award

Frontrunner: Aaron Murray, Georgia - He came from behind to beat LSU, and he did it with zero help from his, ummm… would we call Georgia's attempt to stop people defense?

Other nominees:

Zach Mettenberger, LSU - A preseason Hot Reads opinion poll that asked which SEC player will make the biggest impact didn't even include this guy as an option - unless the 14 percent of people who voted "Other" had him in mind. They most likely didn't.

Nick Marshall, Auburn - That comeback against Mississippi State did wonders for his reputation. The Tigers play Texas A&M this weekend. Just saying.

James Franklin, Missouri - He didn't finish the game against Georgia, but he did enough jabbing so all that was left to do was deliver the knockout blow. It's heartbreaking we won't get to see him play a full, healthy season in the SEC.

Team Logo Face Tattoo Award

Frontrunner: Texas A&M fans - They're paying through the nose for tickets (stadium expansions and Heisman winners tend to have that effect) despite only one quality game at Kyle Field this season. Yet, the Aggie faithful show up for games at a higher rate than anywhere else in the SEC.

Other nominees:

Ole Miss fans - It's not your fault the team didn't live up to the hype. We admire you for not abandoning them - yet.

South Carolina fans - Williams-Brice Stadium and the area that surrounds it are beautiful sights. They look even better with an average attendance above capacity.

Tree Falls in Forest Award

Frontrunner: Rajion Neal, Tennessee - He is in the top 10 of the SEC in rushing yards, rushing attempts, rushing touchdowns, all-purpose yards and touchdowns scored. But you don't know that because he plays for Tennessee.

Other nominees:

Alex Collins, Arkansas - Great talent, not-so-great team. What idiot says any other conference besides the SEC prepares players better for the NFL?

Jordan Matthews, Vanderbilt - Name a receiving category, and he's not looking up at too many other guys in the conference. Still, it's not doing much to help a team that will struggle to win six games.

Flop and Fail Award

Frontrunner:  Ole Miss - Unlimited optimism, limited success. But hey, they can still sell people on the Manning name, so that's something.

Other nominees:

Vanderbilt - We expected more from Vandy this season. Wait… we expected more from Vandy this season?

Georgia defense - Called this one before the season started, too. They were actually worse than expected.

Texas A&M defense - Johnny Manziel would score a bazillion points even if he weren't forced to, but still.

Hot Seat Award

Frontrunner: Mark Stoops, Kentucky - That stellar recruiting class can't get to Lexington fast enough.

Other nominees:

Butch Jones, Tennessee - There are a lot of good things going for the Vols. Unfortunately, most of them don't happen on Saturdays.

You Couldn't Do This Without Me Award

Frontrunner: Reese Dismukes, Auburn - While everyone else is making headlines, this guy is playing center for one of the nation's most productive offenses.

Other nominees:

Greg Robinson, Auburn - The Tigers have allowed the second fewest sacks in the country - mainly because they run so much - but the guy protecting Nick Marshall's blind side still deserves some love.

Jake Matthews, Texas A&M - He blocked for Manziel and Ryan Tannehill. Those are all the references his resume needs.

Wesley Johnson, Vanderbilt - Hot Reads already had a ton of respect for him, and then he went nuts at halftime against UMassUMass! This dude is a boss.

Stat of the Week:

287: That's Auburn's average rushing yards per game - best in the SEC and seventh in the nation. Tre Mason, their leading rusher, averages 86 rushing yards per game. The fact that any team can get that much production without a 100-yard rusher is quite scary.

Copyright 2013 Raycom News Network. All rights reserved.

  • FOX19 Poll

  • Which nominee is most deserving of his Chinstrap Award nomination?

  • Thank you for participating in our poll. Here are the results so far:

    Dak Prescott (Jockstrap Award)
    67%
    24 votes
    Ole Miss (Flop and Fail Award)
    0%
    0 votes
    Jadeveon Clowney (Bottom-of-the-Pile Award)
    22%
    8 votes
    Gary Pinkel (Cool Customer Award)
    11%
    4 votes
    Bo Wallace (Best Comedic Performance)
    0%
    0 votes
    Other nominee (You can also comment below)
    0%
    0 votes
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